Some of you reading this may remember taking in my articles on ThisIsYourConscience.com before my hiatus. Although I haven’t gone into the full reason I stepped away from blogging yet (which I will do sooner than later), one factor in why I stepped away was due to my increased interest and workload in seriously pursuing journalism. As I commissioned larger and larger stories for large, well respected and well recognized newsrooms, I shifted away from blogging and towards reporting on injustice (especially racialized systemic injustice).

So, when I heard the story about a white Onlyfans model (Courtney Tailor aka Courtney Clenney) stabbing her Black boyfriend (Christian Obumseli) to death and somehow not even being arrested, the case instantly piqued my attention. Just that aspect of the story alone, without any in-depth understanding of the outlying details, is fraught with sorts of problematic white privilege and systemic injustice. But, before I could put my thoughts together, the background of both the victim and the suspect were dug up on Twitter.

Apparently, Courtney had made it a point to let everyone know that she “only dates rich Black guys”, which I figured was the problematic pinnacle of this story – until Christian’s tweets were dug up, showing that he had an intense distaste for Black women.

When his past tweets came out, Christian’s family started a GoFundMe account and put out multiple statements effectively saying that although Christian said disgusting things, “the tweets do not diminish our demand for a thorough investigation.” In the GoFundMe link, the family has asked for the “community” to come together to mourn his passing and support the family. While I do hope that his loved ones are surrounded by compassion and are being lifted up everyday in their fight for justice, asking for the broader Black community’s help is just not right.

In the Black community, no one fights harder to protect the lives of Black men, and honour the memories of Black men quite like Black women do. They are the first ones to march for us in droves. They are the main ones stomping the pavement screaming for our murderers to be held accountable. These are not my opinions – these are facts. And yet, that ferocious love is rarely reciprocated. When Black women are murdered by the police, we as Black men rarely are the ones organizing protests for them and, in fact, we are sometimes the victims’ harshest critics (read: Korryn Gaines). We, as Black men, are barely doing enough to repay our sisters for their activism, but now we are going to ask them to hit the streets in full Ferguson mode for a brother who actively despised them?

C’mon bruh.

I know for an absolute fact that if someone could dig into my past, they would find a trailer load of problematic shit. But, throughout my life, from the time I discovered my first ever crush in 1989 up ’til today, the one take I never understood was niggas not wanting anything to do with Black women. My first ever crush, Monie Love, was a Black woman. The women I’ve found the most beautiful, and whom I always envisioned myself loving on and settling down with have always been Black women. Even when I’ve dated women of other races, if someone asked me about my thoughts on interracial dating, the last thing in the world I would have ever done is justify my dating choice by shitting on Black women as a whole.

Simply put, niggas that hate Black women are fucking weirdos.

And, unfortunately, there’s a ton of them these days. Whether they are tweeting stupid shit or sitting their frowsy asses on musty leather couches and recording pussy-ass podcasts about $200 dates and other tired topics, these weirdo-niggas are out here in abundance. And Black women don’t owe them frowsy negroes a goddamn thing in life, purgatory or death.

To be clear, in no way shape or form does someone’s past, or even current, comments about disliking any particular demographic of people mean that they deserve to be murdered. Christian’s strong distaste for Black women does not, in any way, shape or form, lessen the tragedy of his demise or exculpate Courtney Tailor. But, to think that Black women need to rally around this tragedy to support a man whom, in theory and in practice, didn’t give a flying fuck about Black women is audacity at it’s finest. If you don’t want Black women as your wife, or your girlfriends, or your homegirls, or your acquaintances, or your classmates, or your colleagues, then you don’t fucking need Black women as your army of protestors, prayer warriors, and justice advocates.

If white women are so much better than Black women in every way, then let them help you.

This Is Your Conscience